I was taken aback by his statement. I could hear his words but I couldn’t believe I had just done that? How could I have been so unaware, so blind? How could I NOT have known? Playing hostage to circumstances is not my cup of tea. In fact that’s why I brought BluePrint for Success to Louisiana to help people gain their freedom from those meddling unconscious drivers that are the real reason we don’t get the results we want out of life.
Anyway, I digress, the conversation happened during a therapy session on my neck. Due to the long hours at my computer I had developed some nasty posture habits and my body was beginning to rebel.
Now, thanks to the amazing Daniel at Lake Physical Therapy I can sit at my computer without excruciating neck pains. At this particular visit, where Daniel gave me the shocking revelation, I was expecting the same old session. But, typical Daniel, he didn't like the last results so he wanted to look at doing something new to attack the problem. My progress had been slow up to this point and he offered to try something different. The problem was that my joints in a part of my neck were really stiff and he had an idea to loosen them up. Sounded easy enough. As I lay on my back he took my head to move it in different directions to loosen the joints. My job was to lay relaxed and allow my head to move freely. After a bit he seemed to be getting frustrated. Finally he stopped. “Did you know you were tightening you neck muscles?”
“No, I had no idea” I stumbled. “In fact I was trying to do just the opposite.”
That was an important lesson that reminded me of the many coaching sessions and trainings I have done over the years. In every single private session I have ever had, the client had no idea of what was truly driving them to do what they did.
It’s always something like this, they recognize the wrong results in their lives and they want to change them. Easy enough right? Actually, nothing could be further from the truth! That’s why skills training will only get a person so far. I can tell you what needs to be done to correct your issues but that is not going to get you were you want to be. What most people do not know is that deep within us are unconscious drivers that are the real reason for our current results. It is the unconscious drivers that are moving us to make the wrong choices we are making and it is those wrong choices that, in turn, give us the unwanted results we are experiencing.
For instance, I’m going to be very open and honest with you.I know that one of my internal drivers is my deep desire for approval. Not all that bad of a driver until it gets in the way. By wanting to be really good at everything I become mediocre at most everything. Thus, my driver actually causes me to have results counter to what I truly desire and that is… excellence. I must constantly fight the urge to do it myself and force myself to work in my strengths and collaborate with others to do the rest.
Now I am only able to overcome that problem in my life because of my level of awareness and that level of awareness was only revealed to me after weeks of one on one coaching with a highly trained coach.
And here’s the exciting part! Once you become aware of the true drivers that are hijacking your success, those drivers can never ever rule you again. Then you are truly free! Free to be who you want…free to create your own life….free to sit in the driver’s seat of you life.
I had no idea I was moving my own neck until Daniel made me aware of what I was unconsciously doing. Once I knew, then I could produce behavior more conducive to my healing.
Carl Jung said it best, “Until you make the unconscious conscious it will rule your life and you will call it fate.”
You can’t have real change in your life and in your business unless you experience real transformation.